No matter how sincere you are about wanting to pursue your goals and feel better about your life, you may be sabotaging your own success in ways you don’t realize, preventing you from living your best life!
If you are pouring energy into trying to achieve your goals, but aren’t making progress, check to see whether you are doing any of these five things. They could be holding you back or draining your energy. Stop doing them so you can start to feel better about your life!
1. Are you comparing yourself with others?
A little bit of competitiveness can be an excellent motivator, but, as Farnam Street points out, if you’re always comparing yourself with others you’re never going to be content. This is because there will always be someone more successful or talented, or who has it easier, or who has something you feel you need to be happy.
Obsessing nonstop over what others have leaves you with no time to appreciate what you have. It can make you bitter and resentful too, which will make you less productive. So, if you constantly compare yourself with others, stop doing so today and feel better about your life!
2. Are you trying to do everything at once?
Perhaps you feel you don’t have time for anything but work because your plate is too full. Or maybe you don’t completely trust others to make good decisions and feel it’s all on you. These are often the result of a work-life balance that’s off kilter. The stress of this can build up until you are exhausted and burned out.
To feel better about your life, prioritize self-care and give yourself a chance to check out on occasion. If you feel this is impossible, it may be time to hire someone to help you manage the tasks you’re dealing with. Just bringing on a virtual assistant might be a game-changer for you.
3. Are you wasting energy on toxic relationships?
Yes, maintaining relationships can sometimes take a little patience, but when the relationship is healthy and positive, the work that goes into them is always worthwhile. In a good relationship, you should be able to relax and be yourself, and you should trust your friend or loved one not to go behind your back or undermine you.
In unhealthy relationships, Women’s Health explains you may feel perpetually exhausted and as though you always must be on your guard against manipulation or gaslighting. Relationships of that sort are exhausting and bad for your mental health. To feel better now, set some boundaries and protect yourself from toxic people.
4. Are you working a job you hate?
Unfortunately, it’s not always possible to switch out an unsatisfactory job for a satisfying one. But if you are truly miserable at work, it’s worth making an extra effort to feel better about your life. Search for a new position or even switch careers completely.
Remember that there may be a job out there you’re qualified for that you haven’t even dreamed of. If not, however, there’s still the possibility of taking classes or training for a different position.
5. Are you waiting for everything to be perfect to feel better about your life?
If you’ve been putting off making needed life changes because the time isn’t right, or you don’t feel the opportunity is ideal, ask yourself whether you are simply procrastinating.
After all, no time will ever be completely right and no situation entirely ideal. This is a case of letting the perfect become the enemy of the good, and you should stop doing it right away. Instead of procrastinating because things aren’t perfect, feel better immediately by making a plan to improve your situation, one step at a time.
Even if you can’t magically change everything in your life right this minute, there are still plenty of choices and changes you can make that will bring about immediate improvement. Sometimes it’s simply a matter of changing your thinking. Sometimes it has to do with your work or relationships.
Whatever the case, don’t delay, and make the changes you can make, now, for a happier and healthier life.
Guest Author: Dorothy Watson
Dorothy Watson grew up with a single mother who suffered from bipolar disorder. Her mom wasn’t properly diagnosed until Dorothy was about 12 years old, so she saw her mom struggle for a long time. Since she has seen how hard life can be for people whose mental health hasn’t been properly addressed, she is an advocate for mental wellness. You can learn more at Mental Wellness Center.
5. Mario Badescu Facial Spray with Aloe, Cucumber and Green Tea
This light facial mist is especially refreshing after staring at a computer screen all day long.
$5.00 from Amazon
Literary Gift Ideas for Therapists
6. Desk Reference to the Diagnostic Criteria from DSM-5 (Spiral-Bound)
$18.49 from Amazon
Every counselor needs one of these!
7. Diagnosis Made Easier, Second Edition: Principles and Techniques for Mental Health Clinicians, Second Edition
$33.00 from Amazon
Amazon: “This popular practitioner guide and course text takes the reader step by step through diagnostic decision making in mental health. Acclaimed for both the clarity of his writing and his clinical expertise, James Morrison provides principles and decision trees for evaluating information from multiple sources and constructing a valid, clinically useful working diagnosis. More than 100 vivid vignettes-from the straightforward to the toughest cases-illustrate the practical application of these methods. Essential topics include developing a differential diagnosis and dealing with comorbidity.”
8. The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are
$12.99 from Amazon
Amazon: “A motivational and inspiring guide to wholehearted living, rather than just the average self-help book, with this groundbreaking work Brené Brown, Ph.D., bolsters the self-esteem and personal development process through her characteristic heartfelt, honest storytelling. With original research and plenty of encouragement, she explores the psychology of releasing our definitions of an ‘imperfect’ life and embracing living authentically. Brown’s ‘ten guideposts’ are benchmarks for authenticity that can help anyone establish a practice for a life of honest beauty—a perfectly imperfect life.”
9. The Gift of Therapy: An Open Letter to a New Generation of Therapists and Their Patients
$10.29 from Amazon
Amazon: “The culmination of master psychiatrist Dr. Irvin D. Yalom’s more than thirty-five years in clinical practice, The Gift of Therapy is a remarkable and essential guidebook that illustrates through real case studies how patients and therapists alike can get the most out of therapy. A book aimed at enriching the therapeutic process for a new generation of patients and counselors, Yalom’s Gift of Therapy is an entertaining, informative, and insightful read for anyone with an interest in the subject.”
10. Letters to a Young Therapist
$14.99 from Amazon
Amazon: “In Letters to a Young Therapist, Dr. Pipher shares what she has learned in thirty years as a therapist, helping warring families, alienated adolescents, and harried professionals restore peace and beauty to their lives. Letters to a Young Therapist gives voice to her practice with an exhilarating mix of storytelling and sharp-eyed observation. And while her letters are addressed to an imagined young therapist, every one of us can take something away from them.”
11. Man’s Search for Meaning
$8.39 from Amazon
Amazon: “This seminal book, which has been called ‘one of the outstanding contributions to psychological thought’ by Carl Rogers and ‘one of the great books of our time’ by Harold Kushner, has been translated into more than fifty languages and sold over sixteen million copies. ‘An enduring work of survival literature,’ according to the New York Times, Viktor Frankl’s riveting account of his time in the Nazi concentration camps, and his insightful exploration of the human will to find meaning in spite of the worst adversity, has offered solace and guidance to generations of readers since it was first published in 1946. At the heart of Frankl’s theory of logotherapy (from the Greek word for ‘meaning’) is a conviction that the primary human drive is not pleasure, as Freud maintained, but rather the discovery and pursuit of what the individual finds meaningful. Today, as new generations face new challenges and an ever more complex and uncertain world, Frankl’s classic work continues to inspire us all to find significance in the very act of living, in spite of all obstacles.”
12. On Being a Therapist
$23.07 on Amazon
Amazon: “For more than thirty years, On Being a Therapist has inspired generations of mental health professionals to explore the most private and sacred aspects of their work helping others. In this thoroughly revised and updated fifth edition, Jeffrey Kottler explores many of the challenges that therapists face in their practices today, including pressures from increased technology, economic realities, and advances in theory and technique. He also explores the stress factors that are brought on from managed care bureaucracy, conflicts at work, and clients’ own anxiety and depression.”
A list of 12 top free apps for meditation and mindfulness. (No subscription fees!)
Compare app ratings for apps for meditation from the Apple store, Google Play, and Psyberguide. (All ratings are based on five stars.) Please feel free to add your vote!
“An award-winning app developed for teenage mental health by Dr. Nihara Krause, Consultant Clinical Psychologist, using the basic principles of an evidence-based therapy called Dialectical Behavioural Therapy (DBT).”
5 and 15 minute activities to comfort, distract, express, and release. You can also use this app to practice guided breathing, to log your activities (and self-monitor), and to journal.
Apple StoreRating: 4.4 stars (556 ratings)
Google Play Rating: 4.3 stars (1,982 ratings)
Psyberguide Rating: 3.00 (credibility) and 4.28 (user experience)
“The COVID Coach app was created for everyone, including Veterans and Service members, to support self-care and overall mental health during the coronavirus (COVID-19) pandemic.”
Challenges and tools, including meditations and guided imagery. You can also use this app to find online help or to learn more about mental wellbeing.
Apple Store Rating: 4.8 stars (708 ratings)
Google Play Rating: 4.6 stars (274 ratings)
Psyberguide Rating: 2.67 (credibility) and 4.49 (user experience)
“The ground-breaking Healthy Minds Program uses neuroscience, contemplative traditions, and skill-based learning methods to help you develop the skills for a healthy mind, now in the palm of your hand. Translating pioneering neuroscience into tools for everyday life, our unique framework guides you through the four pillars of the science of training the mind.”
Guided meditations for awareness, connection, insight, and purpose.
Apple Store Rating: 4.9 stars (672 ratings)
Google Play Rating: 4.7 stars (1,032 ratings)
Psyberguide Rating: 3.67 (credibility) and 4.38 (user experience)
Subscription: No, but you must sign up for a free account
“We offer the largest free library of guided meditations on earth and the world’s most loved meditation Timer, for free.”
95,000 guided meditations, stories, and soundscapes for sleep, recovery and healing, stress and anxiety, performance, health and happiness, relationships, and spirituality. You can also access live events, discussion groups, and classes.
Apple Store Rating: 4.9 stars (305K ratings)
Google Play Rating: 4.9 stars (125,993 ratings)
Psyberguide Rating: 3.33 (credibility) and 4.38 (user experience)
Subscription: No. You have the option of creating a free account.
“Mantras are phrases we repeat to ourselves that highlight our strengths & values and can motivate us to do and feel good. A mantra helps you become your best possible self and My Mantra is designed to help you get there. As part of the IntelliCare suite of apps, My Mantra lets you create these motivating mantras and construct virtual photo albums to serve as encouragement and reminders of these mantras in your life.”
A simple top free app for developing personal mantras to inspire and uplift.
Apple Store Rating: 5 stars (2 ratings)
Google Play Rating: N/A
Psyberguide Rating: 3.67 (credibility) and 2.78 (user experience)
“Practicing mindfulness means grounding yourself in the present moment. Mindfulness has been shown to be helpful for reducing stress and coping with unpleasant thoughts and emotions. Mindfulness Coach will help you practice mindfulness meditation.”
Mindfulness training and practices. You can also use this app to set goals and log your progress.
Apple Store Rating: 4.7 stars (4K ratings)
Google Play Rating: 4.8 stars (5,230 ratings)
Psyberguide Rating: 3.00 (credibility) and 3.30 (user experience)
“Break free from anxiety and stress using this free evidence-based anxiety management app. MindShift CBT uses scientifically proven strategies based on Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT).”
Learn about anxiety, listen to guided meditations, track your moods, journal, and set goals with this top free app.
Apple Store Rating: 4.4 stars (206 ratings)
Google Play Rating: 4.0 stars (1,432 ratings)
Psyberguide Rating: 3.67 (credibility) and 4.29 (user experience)
Subscription: No, but you must sign up for a free account
“Oak helps you decompress by transforming your meditation practice from an experiment into a habit. We support you from your first session to your 500th, with mindful, loving-kindness, and sleep meditations as well as unguided sessions and breathing exercises. Individualize your meditations by duration, and customize with silence or calming background sounds. Oak tracks your progress and encourages you to continue building a healthy meditation practice.”
Meditations and breathing exercises for relaxation and sleep. You can also access a mantra meditation course with this top free app.
“Lower your stress levels, reduce anxiety, overcome fears, relieve pain, get better sleep, and so much more. All made possible with access to hundreds of meditations in the Tapping Solution App. You’ll learn how to use Tapping (also known as EFT, or Emotional Freedom Techniques), to lead a happier and healthier life.”
Tapping meditations and audiobooks.
Apple Store Rating: 4.8 stars (7.4K ratings)
Google Play Rating: 4.6 stars (6,098 ratings)
Psyberguide Rating: N/A
Subscription: $94.99 yearly (some content available without a subscription, account sign-up is free)
“With this easy-to-use app, you can practice mindfulness meditation anywhere, anytime with the guidance of the UCLA Mindful Awareness Research Center. Scientific research shows mindfulness can help manage stress-related physical conditions, reduce anxiety and depression, cultivate positive emotions, and help improve overall physical health and well-being.”
Basic and wellness meditations, as well as videos and podcasts.
Guest Post by Ralph Macey, Writer/Blogger/Health Care Coordinator
Happiness is all about mindset. Many believe that happiness depends on external factors, but this is not the case. Happiness depends on your mindset. Absolute happiness can exist even in the face of adversity when you have a positive mindset.
Setbacks will always be a part of life. No one can avoid hardships or problems, not even monks or saints. When problems arise, you can tackle them head-on. And when there are joyous moments in life, you can savor them. And when you can remain relatively unaffected by whatever is happening around you, you can create a mindset of absolute happiness.
Here are nine mental health tips for cultivating happiness and developing a happiness mindset.
Have gratitude for everything you have.
Human beings have a disgusting trait. They tend to focus more on the negative aspects of life than the positive. Oftentimes, people are more concerned about the things they do not have instead of the ones they already possess. Hence, they become unhappy.
When you dwell on the things you’re missing out on, it is easy to be unhappy. For example, you may feel resentful when you don’t receive a raise or promotion at work. However, when you look outside of yourself at the millions of unemployed people in the world, you may feel better. (At least you have a job!)
Have gratitude for everything you have. Gratitude helps to develop positive emotions, enjoy experiences, tackle adverse situations, and build healthy relationships. When you have gratitude for even the small things in your life, you feel happy.
“Happiness will never come to those who don’t appreciate what they already have.”
Anonymous
Develop a growth mindset and discard the fixed mindset.
There are two kinds of mindsets. The first is the fixed mindset, and the second, the growth mindset.
In a fixed mindset, you are resistant to change. You are rigid in your way of thinking and are not concerned with self-improvement or personal growth. When you encounter challenges, you choose to not learn from them. You tend to defend your position blindly. Hence, you become an angry, irritated, fearful, and unhappy person.
In a growth mindset, you crave learning and personal development. Whenever there is a challenge, you view it as an opportunity for improvement. With a growth mindset, you evaluate the situation, acknowledge the drawbacks, and focus on the skills you need to be successful. You do not have an inflexible, narrow mindset and are not driven by ego. Instead, you embrace any new challenge as a learning opportunity. Thus, you become happy and content.
If you want to be happy, adopt a growth mindset and discard the fixed mindset. Regard every challenge you face as a medium to grow and prosper.
Make a list of the things that make you happy.
To foster a happiness mindset, make a list of the things and memories that make you happy. Every morning, jot down a few words or phrases (i.e., friends, a favorite vacation, a beloved pet, your favorite meal, a brand new car, etc.). Add to your list daily. Once you have a list of considerable length, devote 30 minutes to reviewing it. In those 30 minutes, reflect on the people, places, events, and things that bring you joy.
Do not overthink or judge yourself.
Human beings have 6200 thoughts per day. And not all of those 6200 thoughts are positive. You experience both positive and negative thoughts. Try to not dwell on your negative thoughts, and do not overanalyze them. When you overthink things, you may worry unnecessarily and feel unhappy. Also, do not be ashamed of your negative thoughts. It is okay to have negative thoughts; just don’t let them overpower you. For a happiness mindset, let the negative go, and instead, focus on the positive.
Think about the best moment of the day.
Before going to sleep at night, think about the best moment of your day. It will bring a smile to your face. Did you love the food your significant other cooked for dinner? Or, if the meal was mediocre at best, be happy that they took out time from their busy schedule to prepare something for you. (It’s the thought that counts, right?) Relish in the feelings of happiness and gratitude as you drift off to sleep.
Focus on your goals and the journey rather than the obstacles.
You will face obstacles in life. Sometimes, you will fail and fall flat on your face. But you can pick yourself back up. Focus on your goals and on the journey itself, not on stumbling blocks you encounter along the way. When you’re fixated on a problem, you become discouraged and are thereby less likely to look for the solution. Subsequently, you get stuck, and happiness may seem out of reach.
To get unstuck, develop a plan, and then take action to achieve your goals. Get back on track with a renewed focus, and fight until you succeed. Your vision of success will help you move forward as you continue on your journey.
“Happiness is a journey, not a destination.”
Ben Sweetland (Author and Psychologist)
Think positive thoughts about others.
When you think negatively about the people in your life, you become incapable of maintaining healthy, genuine relationships. Misunderstanding and miscommunication can lead to conflict. Heated arguments or giving the cold shoulder generates hostility.
As much as possible, assume that others have positive intentions. For a happiness mindset, do not judge their words, actions, or motives. Judgments cloud your heart with unhappiness.
Stop comparing yourself with others.
Each life is precious. Every journey is different.
Now, envision that you’re scrolling through Facebook. You probably see smiling, attractive faces and happy, perfect families. In comparison, your life may seem dull or pathetic. Suppose you just went through a painful breakup, and when you view your home feed, all you see is your friends getting married or having babies. You may feel disheartened. If so, remind yourself that Facebook only reveals a tiny piece of the picture, not the full story. You are looking at edited highlights of your friends’ lives. You don’t know what happens behind the scenes. For a happiness mindset, stop comparing your life with others, and write your own story.
“Happiness is letting go of what you think your life is supposed to look like and celebrating it for everything that it is.”
Mandy Hale (Author)
Seek medical help to regain your lost happiness.
Happiness leaves your life when you develop severe depression. Depression is like a thief. It steals optimism and joy. If left untreated, depression can lead to hopelessness and mental anguish and will rob you of the ability to feel any pleasure or enjoyment. It may impact your relationships with others, in addition to affecting sleep, appetite, and energy levels.
Unfortunately, the stigma associated with depression and other mental disorders may prevent people from seeking the medical care they need. Many view mental illness as a choice, a weakness, or even a put-on. In reality, the brain, like all other internal organs, is susceptible to illness.
What would you do if you were having heart palpitations, dizziness, and chest pain? Would you ignore your symptoms… or would you ask someone to drive you to the nearest hospital? Certainly, you would seek immediate medical care. Urgent health issues require treatment; likewise, urgent mental health issues require treatment.
When there are chemical imbalances in the brain, your thoughts, emotions, and perceptions are affected. As a result, you experience depression, anxiety, etc.
If you are depressed, consult with a psychiatrist to learn about available treatment options. After assessing your symptoms, the psychiatrist will recommend one or more medical treatments. The first line of treatment for depression typically consists of medication and psychotherapy. However, if your symptoms persist despite continued treatment, your doctor may prescribe an alternative treatment, transcranial magnetic stimulation therapy, or TMS therapy.
What is TMS therapy?
TMS therapy is a non-invasive treatment that involves the delivery of recurring magnetic energy impulses to the parts of your brain that regulate mood. The magnetic pulses stimulate targeted brain cells to enhance communication between different parts of your brain, restoring balance. When TMS therapy is given at regular intervals, it is called repetitive TMS (or rTMS). TMS therapy reduces symptoms of depression and improves mood. TMS therapy is also effective for decreasing symptoms associated with OCD, PTSD, anxiety disorders, chronic pain, etc. This treatment is painless and has little to no side-effects. It does not involve sedation. Even after undergoing a session, you can drive back to your home without any hassle. That’s the best part of TMS therapy.
Conclusion
In conclusion, to cultivate a happiness mindset, you must master your mind, not the other way around. True happiness comes from within and is not influenced by external factors.
To develop the happiness mindset, practice gratitude, strive to improve yourself and learn, reflect on the things that make you happy (daily), be kind to yourself (and others), be solution-focused, compare self with self (not anyone else), and seek psychiatric care for depression.
Guest Author: Ralph Macey, Writer/Blogger/Health Care Coordinator
Ralph Macey, a professional writer since 2008 and medical health/patient care coordinator at savantcare.com since 2014, writes articles on all mental health-related subjects. He holds a degree and two professional certifications in his field and continues to upgrade his knowledge with additional classes and seminars. He also provides mental health consultations and private fitness instructions for free in his local community.
This is a list of websites, books, free printable PDF workbooks, and free online courses for finding happiness.
“It’s a helluva start, being able to recognize what makes you happy.”
Lucille Ball
12 RECOMMENDED WEBSITES
Authentic Happiness | A University of Pennsylvania website developed by the Positive Psychology Center with resources including readings, videos, research, questionnaires, and more
Center for Healthy Minds | A University of Wisconsin-Madison website with a mission to “cultivate well-being and relieve suffering through a scientific understanding of the mind”
Feeling Good | A David D. Burns website with free articles, assessments, podcasts, and more
A 35-page PDF coloring book from Rec Therapy Today. Most of the coloring sheets are images of animals, including a panda, a peacock, a Pegasus, a dolphin, and more!
A modest collection of printable free coloring sheets. Color a bird mandala or an enchanted fairy! There are also several holiday-themed coloring pages.
A 51-page PDF coloring book with 31 mandala designs from the site Healing from Burnout. The coloring book includes 8 bonus templates for creating your own designs!
A collection of coloring books from Coloring Craze. The books aren’t free, but you can download sample free coloring pages. Books include Motivational Quotes & Phrases, 30 Day of the Dead Coloring Pages, and Stress Relieving & Relaxing Patterns series.
A collection of free coloring books from libraries and other cultural institutions from around the world. Download and print coloring pages from the New York Academy of Medicine Library, the Getty Research Institute, the Folger Shakespeare Library, and many more!
Photographer Louise Lawler worked with children’s book illustrator Jon Buller to create this unique 12-page coloring book. Each page is a black-and-white version of one of her photographs of places where art is displayed.
A small collection of printable coloring sheets. Choose from designs such as “Art with Edge Sugar Skulls,” “Lennon and McCartney Yellow Submarine,” or “InSPIRALed.”
Free coloring sheets and books to print. You can download coloring books like “Forest Animals,” “Zentangle Horses,” “Beautiful Women Portraits,” and “Floral Fantasy” (among others) or print coloring pages (including color-by-number!) from a variety of categories (mammals, fruits, fantasy, stories, space, etc.)
Free downloadable coloring book (from the Public Domain Review site) with 20 images from a wide range of artists, including Hokusai, Albrecht Dürer, Harry Clarke, Virginia Frances Sterrett, Jessie M. King, and Aubrey Beardsley.
Babouchkina, A., & Robbins, S. J. (2015). Reducing negative mood through mandala creation: A randomized controlled trial. Art Therapy, 32(1), 34-39.
Bell, C. E., & Robbins, S. J. (2007). Effect of art production on negative mood: A randomized, controlled trial. Art Therapy, 24(2), 71-75.
Curry, N. A., & Kasser, T. (2005). Can coloring mandalas reduce anxiety? Art Therapy, 22(2), 81-85.
Eaton J., & Tieber, C. (2017). The effects of coloring on anxiety, mood, and perseverance. Art Therapy, 34(1), 42-46.
Henderson, P., Rosen, D., & Mascaro, N. (2007). Empirical study on the healing nature of mandalas. Psychology of Aesthetics, Creativity, and the Arts, 1(3), 148–154.
Muthard, C., & Gilbertson, R. (2016). Stress management in young adults: Implications of mandala coloring on self-reported negative affect and psychophysiological response. Psi Chi Journal of Psychological Research, 21(1), 16-28.
Small, S. R. (2006). Anxiety reduction: Expanding previous research on mandala coloring. The Undergraduate Journal of Psychology, 19(1), 15-21.
van der Vennet, R., & Serice, S. (2012). Can coloring mandalas reduce anxiety? A replication study. Art Therapy, 29(2), 87-92.
A recent study found that many mental health professionals do not recognize their own burnout. For therapists and other mental health workers, self-care is essential for preventing burnout and compassion fatigue.
Self-care is never a selfish act—it is simply good stewardship of the only gift I have, the gift I was put on earth to offer to others.
Parker Palmer
This is a list of self-care ideas and strategies for mental health professionals. Please share with anyone who might benefit!
1) Take small breaks throughout the day. Spend a few moments sitting in silence, browse funny memes, joke with a coworker, or take your lunch outside; by the end of your workday, you won’t feel as drained.
2) Meditate. Spend at least 5-10 minutes a day, in the morning or between sessions, meditating or listening to guided imagery recordings.
3) Schedule an appointment weeks in advance for a facial or massage. You’ll have something to look forward to!
4) Don’t neglect your basic needs. Drink water, choose healthy foods, exercise, and get plenty of sleep.
Don’t take your health for granted. Don’t take your body for granted. Do something today that communicates to your body that you desire to care for it. Tomorrow is not promised.
Jada Pinkett Smith
5) Reach out to people in your support network. When experiencing burnout, we have a tendency to think we’re weak or less capable. We may struggle to admit what we’re going through. However, seeking support during these times is more important than ever.
6) Don’t bring your work home with you. It can be difficult to not think about the problems a client is experiencing or to check your email, but it’s crucial to have balance in your life. If you let your work consume you, you’ll soon find yourself depleted and with nothing to give.
7) Take the time to sincerely thank or praise your colleagues. Sometimes, it seems as though we’re in a thankless field. Spread positivity by expressing gratitude and giving compliments. (I also like to pass along the praise I hear for someone else!)
8) Be kind to yourself. Be realistic. Practice positive self-talk and forgive yourself for the mistakes you make. Acknowledge that you’re not always going to know the right thing to say, nor will you be able to help every client you see.
Talk to yourself like you would to someone you love.
Brené Brown
9) Treat yourself to your favorite beverage at least once a week. Enjoy a Starbucks coffee or a kombucha tea during the workday. Consider surprising a coworker with one too!
10) If you work in a shared office space or residential setting, get up and communicate in-person instead of sending an email. (You can always follow-up with an email to recap the convo if needed.) Human interaction throughout the day is far more rewarding than staring at a screen.
11) Take a short “nature bath”! Multiple studies have found that being outdoors improves mood and reduces stress. If you work in an urban setting, nurture a potted plant or listen to nature sounds in your office to promote relaxation.
I found in my research that the biggest reason people aren’t more self-compassionate is that they are afraid they’ll become self-indulgent. They believe self-criticism is what keeps them in line. Most people have gotten it wrong because our culture says being hard on yourself is the way to be.
16. Listen to music while typing your notes.I love paperwork… Said no therapist ever. Play your favorite tunes to motivate you and make the time pass quickly.
17. Immerse yourself in quiet with a silent commute. After listening to talk all day long, it’s soothing to listen to absolutely nothing on your way home. Recharge with silence.
Post your favorite self-care strategies in a comment!
American Society for Horticultural Science. (2020, January 2). Plants can improve your work life: The mere sight of an indoor plant can reduce stress. ScienceDaily. Retrieved September 28, 2020 from http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2020/01/200102184829.htm
Frontiers. (2019, April 4). Stressed? Take a 20-minute ‘nature pill’: Just 20 minutes of contact with nature will lower stress hormone levels, reveals new study. ScienceDaily. Retrieved September 28, 2020 from http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2019/04/190404074915.htm
Mary Ann Liebert, Inc.. (2010, November 12). Yoga’s ability to improve mood and lessen anxiety is linked to increased levels of a critical brain chemical, research finds. ScienceDaily. Retrieved September 27, 2020 from http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2010/11/101111160539.htm
Stress is the body’s reaction to an event or situation. Primarily a physiological response, stress is also experienced psychologically (i.e. worry). Too much stress is associated with mental health issues and chronic health problems.
Because we often have no control over stressors in our lives, it’s important to effectively manage stress.
Here are eight fast-acting stress relievers for short-term relief. (Click here for additional mood boosters.)
Less time sitting = Better mood and stress relief. A recent study found that replacing sedentary behavior with sleep or light exercise (i.e. walking, gardening, etc.) improved mood. Substituting sleep was associated with decreased stress levels in addition to enhanced mood.
Keep a plant in your office and place it where it’s easy to see for stress relief. Tending for and gazing at a small indoor plant may reduce stress during the workday.
You’ll feel more relaxed and less stressed after receiving a head-and-neck or neck-and-shoulder massage. One study found that participants experienced reduced rates of both physiological and psychological stress after 10 minutes of massage.
Casual flirting and light-hearted banter at work may alleviate stress. Research indicates that engaging in flirtatious behaviors can lead to positive feelings about self while enhancing mood.
Drinking Matcha green tea may lead to feeling less stressed. Researchers found that mice who consumed Matcha powder or extract experienced reductions in anxiety.
When faced with a stressful situation, have your significant other present to ease your anxiety. If your partner is unavailable, visualize him/her; simply thinking of a significant other has comparable positive effects on blood pressure and stress reactivity.
Frequent laughter seems to be a buffer for stress; people who laugh a lot experience fewer stress-related symptoms. Researchers found that the more someone laughed, the less likely they were to feel stressed.
“Music produces a kind of pleasure which human nature cannot do without.”
Confucius
In one study, participants who listened to upbeat music while actively trying to feel happier experienced improved mood as well as increased happiness over the next two weeks.
A 2017 study indicated that listening to your favorite songs impacts the brain circuit involved in internally focused thought, empathy, and self-awareness. Interestingly, it doesn’t matter what type of music you choose; the mood-boosting effect is consistent across genres.
Alternatively, consider a stroll in the park for a boost. Researchers found that individuals with depression who took an hour-long nature walk experienced significant increases in attention and working memory when compared to individuals who walked in urban areas. Interestingly, both groups of participants experienced similar boosts in mood; walking in an urban area can be just as effective!
More recently, researchers found that people who regularly commute through natural environments (i.e. passing by trees, bodies of water, parks, etc.) reported better mental health compared to those who don’t. This association was even stronger among active commuters (walking or biking to work). If you commute through congested or urban areas, consider an alternate route, especially when you’re feeling down.
Spending time outside does more than just improve your mood. A 2018 report established a link between nature and overall wellness. Living close to nature and spending time outside reduces the risk of type II diabetes, cardiovascular disease, premature death, preterm birth, stress, and high blood pressure. Exposure to green space may also benefit the immune system, reduce inflammation, and increase sleep duration.
Read/view something inspiring or humorous
Do you have a favorite inspirational book or collection of poems? Do you like viewing motivational TED Talks? Do you enjoy comedy shows? Maybe you like watching videos of baby goats or flash mobs on Facebook. (I do!)
One study found that viewing cat videos boosted energy and positive emotions while decreasing negative feelings (such as anxiety, annoyance, and sadness). Internet cats = Instant mood boost. However, if cyber cats are not your thing, search around to find something enjoyable to read or watch for your happiness quick-fix.
Plan your next adventure
I’m happiest when I’m traveling the world. Unfortunately, I have limited vacation days (as well as limited funds), which means I don’t get to travel as often as I’d like. Happily, planning a trip may produce the same mood-boosting effects as going on a trip.
In 2010, researchers found that before taking a trip, vacationers were happier compared to those not planning a trip. A 2002 study indicated that people anticipating a vacation were happier with life in general and experienced more positive/pleasant feelings compared to people who weren’t. In both studies, researchers attributed happiness levels to anticipation. (The brain releases dopamine during certain activities, causing us to feel pleasure. Dopamine is also released in anticipation of a pleasurable activity.) For a mood boost, start planning!
The next time you’re having a bad day, listen to your favorite song, go hiking in the woods, watch a TED Talks, start planning your next vacation, or spend some quality time with a furry friend… you’ll feel better!
What foods are associated with increased psychiatric symptoms? What should you eat if you want to boost your mood? Learn what researchers have found when it comes to diet and mental well-being.
Feed Your Mood: The Remarkable Link Between Diet & Mental Health
You may have heard of the “food-mood connection.” Research indicates that our food choices greatly impact not only physical health, but mental well-being. Some foods seem to boost mood and reduce psychiatric symptoms while others are linked to depression and anxiety.
Fruits and vegetables are good for mood, but raw fruits and veggies are better. A raw diet is associated with higher levels of mental wellbeing and lower levels of psychiatric symptoms. According to a recent study, the top raw foods associated with mental wellness are apples, bananas, berries, carrots, citrus fruits, cucumbers, grapefruit, kiwi, lettuce, and dark, leafy greens.
So how many servings of fruit/veggies should you eat per day for optimal mental health? At least 8, according to one study that found happiness benefits were evident for each portion for up to 8 servings per day.
What nutrients should you include in your diet for improved mental health? Research indicates the following are important for mental wellbeing: Omega-3 fatty acids (fish, flaxseed, walnuts), phospholipids (egg yolk, soybeans), niacin (liver, avocado, brown rice), folate (legumes, beets, broccoli), vitamin B6 (chickpeas, tuna), and vitamin B12 (sardines, fortified nutritional yeast).
In sum, skip the fast food and soda; head to the salad bar instead to feed your mood and your belly!
References
Bonnie Beezhold, Cynthia Radnitz, Amy Rinne & Julie DiMatteo (2015) Vegans report less stress and anxiety than omnivores, Nutritional Neuroscience, 18:7, 289-296, doi: 10.1179/1476830514Y.0000000164
Boston University. (2017, April 20). Is soda bad for your brain? (And is diet soda worse?): Both sugary, diet drinks correlated with accelerated brain aging. ScienceDaily. Retrieved from http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2017/04/170420162254.htm
Knüppel, A., Shipley, M. J., Llewellyn, C. H., & Brunner, E. J. (2017). Sugar intake from sweet food and beverages, common mental disorder and depression: prospective findings from the Whitehall II study. Scientific reports, 7(1), 6287. doi: 0.1038/s41598-017-05649-7
Lim SY, Kim EJ, Kim A, Lee HJ, Choi HJ, Yang SJ. Nutritional Factors Affecting Mental Health. Clin Nutr Res. 2016 Jul;5(3):143-152. https://doi.org/10.7762/cnr.2016.5.3.143
